Insights into Parenthood...

I have been spending a lot of time thinking about parenthood, and all the things I would never know had I not been so blessed as to become a mother. One of the greatest lessons that parenthood has taught me was GRACE. Before I was a parent, I was the judgmental preschool teacher that would NEVER allow her children to behave in such a way; I was the annoyed daughter who could not understand why her parents made the decisions they made; I was naive, immature, and inexperienced.

Now when a parent brings their child into school wearing pajamas and eating a cookie, I give a knowing look and say, "Rough morning?"

I let my Mom know that I finally "get it."

Now I know and experience a love so deep and powerful that I can relate to the statement, "My heart swells with love."

And perhaps the most poignant of realizations as a parent is knowing just how much God loves us--as our Heavenly Father. The forgiveness and love we extend to our children is just a glimpse of how God takes care of us.

Some of the lessons I learn about myself are through my boys! My eldest gets upset and frustrated easily and he will stomp and cry and throw things--expecting me to come and make it better. When I tell him that he needs to come to me and say, "Mom, I need you, can you please help me?" It is to teach him to recognize his weakness, address it, and ask for help. Is that ANY different from what God wants from us? To recognize our weaknesses and ask Him for help? It's funny, as a parent I know what needs to be done to settle my son down--just as God knows what we need. God wants us to seek Him, not for Him--but for us. Just as we want our children to seek us. I could easily swoop in and fix everything--but we learn through failure, we get better through practice, we excel through struggle.

As a parent it is not easy to watch my son struggle. It is my duty as a good parent to refrain from rescuing him and take the time to let him struggle, to challenge him, and to make him try before helping him. I am teaching him to be responsible and independent. I am teaching him to learn from his mistakes and to be proud when he struggles and achieves his goals.

This is no different from what God does with us! Having this insight has helped me so much in my faith. God does not want to withhold from us any good thing (Ps. 84:11)--just as we do not want to withhold good from our own children. There is nothing I hold more dear in my life than my boys, and I am but a mere human. How much more does God love us and hold us dear--His creation (John 3:16)?

When I think of fathers and fatherhood, I think of many men I have known and currently know in my life. I think mainly of our Heavenly Father, and know that I can celebrate Him on Father's day! I think of my Dad, who is no longer with us-- and some of my favorite memories of him include riding with him in the car as a teenager and him saying, "Megan Wegan! Which way should we go?" and I would point and we would get lost on the road, just talking and listening to loud 90s music like Dinosaur Jr. and Metallica and Magnapop. Or sitting with Dad watching the sunrise while he smoked outside on the front porch. Sometimes we would talk, and sometimes we would say nothing and I would watch the smoke drift up into the pink and orange sky. I think of my Grandfather, who I will always remember as being the kindest, gentlest man in my life. I think of the Dads I know who are doing their best to keep it together and be there for their kids; and I believe all Dads need love and encouragement because being a parent is a scary business--whether married, widowed, divorced, a stepdad, or separated--just being a parent period is not easy.

So, to all Dad's out there--Thank you! You will never be perfect! All you can do is your best. I promise the effort you make with your children will not be forgotten when they are older. You will be surprised as they recall some of the more random things you did with them!

And remember the Ultimate Father-- who loves us with an everlasting love--God.

Happy Father's Day!