Never regret...

We all have them.

Regrets.

Things we wished we could have done differently--or not at all.

I have a good friend who chooses to live a life without regret.

"I would not be who I am today if it were not for my mistakes and experiences that happened before now."

Words that ring true, and prick my heart.

We are a concoction of so many things: our choices, experiences, the people in our lives, the things that happen to us outside of our control, the choices others make that affect us, when we are born and where we are born and who we are born to, our personalities, talents, skills, passions...the list goes on and on.

Unfortunately it sometimes it seems like we have very little control in our lives, and that can lead to feelings of worthlessness and uselessness.

But that is the furthest thing from the truth.

We are each unique--and hold immeasurable worth in the eyes of the Lord.

It has been a year since I began my writing journey, and we have explored the woods together in summer, fall and winter.

It is spring now, and the stunning displays of flowers and the vibrant green of new leaves and buds is both inspiring and energizing. I will sprinkle this post with pictures I have taken during my most recent hikes. Some of the flowers look positively alien! I am so fascinated by creation and nature and encountering it then capturing it thrills me.

This is one of the first pictures I took this spring.

There was still a chill in the air and the leaves had not completely opened up from their buds--but these stunning pink flowers stood out invitingly and declared that spring was coming!

I have only recently been able to get back out on the trail with any regularity, and the time change has allowed me to return to my sanctuary and hike in the evenings after work before darkness falls.

It was so refreshing to get back out on the trail--and I realized that it feels like home to me. I have this endless love for the trees and all the nuances of change and life within the woods. It is a constant reminder of God and a comfort to my soul.

As I previously stated, some of the images I captured of ferns and weeds look positively alien!

Yet they are fascinating and complex and beautiful all the same.

Try as hard as we may, we can never get rid of all the weeds in our lives. They come back more stubborn than ever and some have thorns and are immune even to the strongest of pesticides. I have admiration for these plants, as they can grow anywhere and take over any area where plants grow. They can be very difficult to pull up from the ground, and in my experience they tend to grow quickly and bury roots deep into the ground.

It makes me want to be like a weed. Strong and proud and willing to grow anywhere. Strange and thorny and deep rooted and resilient to most conditions and chemicals. They grow quickly are happy to be solitary in the midst of an entire garden.

While I was walking today I noticed in the very midst of a field of wispy tall grass, there was a lone weed like the image above--it was taller than the grass and the girth of its stalk was like that of a young tree! It struck me to see this image and my admiration for the annoying plant was strengthened by this sight.

It is always surprising for me to encounter such a large variety of different plants. There are the graceful flowers and the prickly weeds, and the fuzzy ferns. Leaf buds are bursting with life and flowers send out alluring fragrances that waft through the breeze. Everything is vibrant and lush and lively.

I cannot begin to choose which season's splendor is the most impressive!

In all fairness, they are each splendid in their own way. Each season has its own story to tell, each season has unique traits that make it lovely, and each season has its own personality.

Fall tends to be my favorite, just because the weather is cooler and the leaves are stunning and the smells and sounds of crunching leaves and crisp autumn air are delightful. Oh, and because the insects and snakes are slowing down and not so prolific.

Yet spring has its own wonderful qualities:

The vibrant flowers, the chirping crickets, the warmer weather, the birds and baby animals and promise of life and renewal. Which brings me back to life experiences and regrets.

We live through many different seasons in our lives. They are not all easy, nor do they all make sense. Some seasons are painful and others are helpful. Some seasons are long and dry and others are wet and cold.

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Remember THAT quote? Well...

its pretty true--and, the things that stir us up to think and change and grow--those are generally the more negative things in life, like learning things at the worst time and from the worst mistakes. The prickly weeds in our life, so to speak.

Sometimes though, when we least expect it, something will happen in our lives--we will encounter a four leaf clover--if you will. Something that will feel rare and special and make us stop and pay attention. It does not happen often, and does not always mean anything significant; but it does provide us with a shred of hope--to continue to propel us forward, as opposed to backward.

I encourage you, therefore, to look forward towards the future, as opposed to the past. To accept the pain of the past as an important contribution to where you are presently. To be open to grow and learn and become a stronger person. Life is not going to stop--even if you do. So keep moving forward and continue to strive towards the best future you can.

It is not easy by any means.

One must look at change as a positive thing rather than something that is negative. Change is progress. Progress is forward moving. Forward moving means not being stagnant. It represents growth and the future.

I love this quote--"These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb," it resonates with me because I tend to make things more difficult for myself than necessary. I have a bad habit of second guessing myself constantly and losing focus on what my original instinct was. Instead of learning a lesson from an experience and accepting it and moving forward, sometimes I end up carrying the weight of the pain through anxiety, stress, worry, and regret. Sometimes even through anger or sadness. Oftentimes when I do this, the weight is too much to bear and I am crushed beneath it and stuck, unable to move.

It happens to all of us, and is a part of our journey through life. I am working through a lot of different emotions that range from sadness to rage. I accept that the things I feel and go through are an essential part of who I am becoming, and slowly I am gaining strength and resilience, and am cognizant of situations and how I should best handle them as they begin to unfold.

I do not proclaim to have all the answers, or even half of them.

I only write from my experiences, thoughts, and lessons learned. If you have been following me any length of time, you will probably notice that sometimes I revisit the same topics. Lessons I am having to relearn. And as I go through certain things for a second, third, and even fourth time, I am not going to count them as failures (although I may feel that way for a few moments), but as practice.

All we can do it take one lesson at a time, one experience at a time, and one day at a time.